This dream is over…Dream another one

End of a relationship is one of the most painful things that could happen to anyone. One person is going to feel humiliated, used, betrayed, rejected and wounded.

Actually, they say there are two kinds of pain. One felt by the Dumper and the other by the dumpee.  Dumper is the person who breaks the relationship and the dumpee is the person who wants to hold on to the relation.  The pain Dumper feel is the pain of destroying a relation and the pain of dumpee is usually of rejection.

One could feel really bad and never ever loved by the Ex especially when they see their Ex is happy and moving on with their life. The dumpee could feel that the relation never meant anything to their Ex.

Rejection

It is really sad to see many things the Dumpee do after getting dumped; especially in India. Some throw acid on the dumpers face, some give police case in the name of rape, some calls press conference to say how bad the dumper is, some do physical harm to the dumper,  some kill the dumper, some take social networking to humiliate the dumper etc.

Is it really worth it? Sure, the destructive thoughts cross our mind as a result of the wounded ego and pride; but is killing, humiliating  and cursing the dumper the only way to feel good?

Of course, one might have invested time and money and emotions in a relationship. So if it breaks, it is natural to feel the pain and feeling of rejection. But is that a reason to spoil our life? Is that a reason to make a fool of ourselves and show the world how weak we are and not even capable of handling broken relationship or how obsessive we are? Why do we want to show the world that we are not in control of our emotions?

It is true that end of a relationship can turn our world upside down. But is it really worth to curse the person who dumped and feel miserable till the end? Is getting dumped really the end of the world?

Millions of people have got dumped and living happily in this world after a breakup. Think about that. Stop blaming and complaining. I think each mistake is a learning experience. That is why some call mistakes, a lesson;  a lesson to become stronger, emotionally.  A self-assurance to say with confidence that we are prepared to face anything that life throws at us.

I read this somewhere, the best way to move on is ‘get up, dress up, show up and never give up’. It really made sense to me.

Parents have to educate their kids what to do in case if they get dumped. Like sex education, we need to teach our kids some kind of ‘how to handle rejection’ I guess.

Getting dumped does not mean someone is a bad person. It could be the case that the dumpee is not exactly the one dumper is looking for to spend their life with. And how do you know if someone is good or not without getting close to a person?

Well, our so-called Indian tradition does not accept all these theories. But things are changing. More and more people are getting dumped / divorced and moving on to other relationships. It is a reality. How long can we close our eyes and say that is against our tradition?

25 years ago, I never knew any divorced person personally. Today, I personally know five persons who got divorced.

I have seen some who got dumped writing stories and songs and winning awards.  I know people who got betrayed, doing miracles in their career. I have seen people who got dumped getting more reliable and trustworthy and loving partners!

So why worry? There is life, even after a broken heart. Just move on. Dream another dream and goals. Nothing is really the end of the world. Love yourself first.  Be happy.

The first thing one has to do after a break up is to read and follow the ‘things one should never do after a breakup’ ! There are so many things written on this topic on the net. The second thing to do is, read about ‘things to do after a break up’………..instead of wasting time thinking about taking revenge on ones Ex.

Be happy. Move on.  Look at the bright side! You can meet new people and there will be someone out there who will appreciate and love you the way you are. Simple :)…… Take it easy.

And like always, the trick is to keep breathing and never let anyone destroy your happiness!

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